Until You're Mine
by leytonnaleybrulian
Summary: Demi and Joe can't stand each other. Her best friend/Joe's brother Nick Jonas' family have been the only thing holding her together. Joe is a jerk until he realizes something is going on with Demi and he begins to worry. Joe must choose between his reputation or saving his former best friend (TW self-harm, abuse and drugs)
1. Chapter 1

Demi's P.O.V.

I sighed waking up breathing in bleach from the kitchen. My step mom was cleaning the floors again because my drunk of a father almost cut his finger off. This is an often occurrence in the Lovato house. I stopped caring if he was okay a long time ago he hurt me too many times. You're supposed to always love your family, but I think there are somethings that aren't forgivable. How can you love someone that you don't trust, someone that you fear? You can't it's not possible. My thoughts ran constantly everyday like this. There wasn't a time of the day where I wasn't in constant anxiety or fear. It's not okay living like this. I got in the shower and stared at my legs full of scars and cuts. It sucked living like this and having very few people care about your life. I'm so broken inside and out. I finished up and dried my dark brown hair before putting on some black pants with a black t-shirt and a sparkly vest. I self harm my legs because I've almost gotten caught in situations where I needed to roll up my sleeves. Good thing we had a cat before and I could cover my butt. There's only a few scars on my arms but there is no way you would know I cut myself from how little it is. My legs are a different story and I don't hold back there. I yawned and ruffled through my stuff before finding a razor. I packed it in my gray book bag and got my black boots on. I made it out of the front door before my father woke up. That's my goal every morning. He's not strict he doesn't care where or when I go places. All he cares about is alcohol, drugs and his image so as long as he doesn't get a call from the cops or someone he could care less what I do. It's nice when you have an abusive father that isn't breathing down your throat. I just stayed away from here as much as possible or it's not good. I never knew my mom she moved to Florida when I was 4. All of my friends think my life is normal. No one knows about my self harm or my family issues. All they think is I fight badly with my step mother and my dad gets on my nerves which is a very normal teenage problem. I like it to stay that way my dad works from home running a business that was given to him by my step mom's family. Every cent from that goes to his drugs. It's pathetic and I'm so glad that I'm an only child and don't have to have someone else living this fucked up life too. One day they'll be busted and they'll ask for forgiveness and I can tell them to shove it. I got out of there and made my way to the Jonas house. Nick Jonas and I are best friends along with my cousin Selena Gomez. We are always inseparable. Since my home life wasn't great so growing up I spent most of my time at the Jonas house. Denise Jonas is kind of the surrogate mother of the friendship. Selena's parents loved me but that didn't support my drug addicted parents. They didn't know they still did drugs but Selena's mom knew it happened when I was a kid. Than my mom left and Mandy never liked her ex brother in law he once sexually assaulted her. No one believed my aunt and she promised me she would never tell Selena what they were like back than. My aunt also only wanted me over or Selena over each others houses there often only once a week. Most of the time Mandy would for go that rule on nights Selena suggests sleeping over my house. I've only let her when my dad was out of town. Nick's older brothers Joe and Kevin were always hanging out and leaving Nick behind that just made us even closer. It was like this for about 10 years. Joe was a little older than us but he started kindergarten early so he was only one grade above him. Which is why Kevin and Joe always bonded more. Joe was the same age difference from Nick as he was with Kevin but Nick and Kevin were double. Joe and I use to be close and get along but things changed.

I walked to Nick's house and knocked on the door as it swung open.

"You're late." Joe said rolling his eyes at me.

"Sorry." I walked in past him and into the kitchen. He was miserable to talk to ever since Kevin left. He was not only his brother but his best friend. He went into the army without telling anyone and it almost ruined the family. The bright side was there's a guest room so I can sneak in if I need to get away and I didn't want to go home which was often.

"Demi!" Denise smiled getting me a hug. I love her so much. She treats us like a family and it's the only place I feel extremely safe. I've always felt that here ever since I was little.

"Where's Selena?" She asked me.

"I'm not sure. She usually is here by now." We all had breakfast together every morning since Kevin left mid last year. Before that we always came over after breakfast which sucked because I would starve. My parents didn't cook, sometimes my stepmom would make enough for leftover and I would have food. Usually it's only for the two of them, they think sixteen is too old to need dinner made. Which is fine but they lock the pantry and that's so twisted. I would get a job and buy my own food but they would find it and I have too much going on in my life to worry about a job. I want a summer job to get me out of the house. I almost didn't survive last summer. It was really scary and terrible some nights I slept outside to hide from my dad. I would sneak a banana sometimes. My stepmother was a size 0 and anything bigger than 2 is fat to her. So if I ate anything around her she would call me fat. It was a lot of mental games with her. My dad played his games physically. I knew I wasn't fat it didn't bother me but I had many other issues.

"Hey!" Nick came over for a hug.

"Hey friend." I smiled hugging him tightly.

"Where's that cousin of yours?" He asked sitting down next to me at the table.

"Right here!" Selena walked in with Joe and they both sat down.

"Aren't you dressed a little too fancy for school?" Joe looked at Selena with a judgmental face painted on.

"Shut up asshole." Selena rolled her eyes, she was wearing a green dress and Joe wasn't wrong. She just wanted to impress Nick. I know she's been trying to get him to ask her out for the longest time.

"Whatever Tinkerbell." Joe laughed.

"Tinkerbell has blond hair, idiot." I said the last part under my breath but Joe still heard it.

"Nice shot freak." Joe played back.

"I think you look beautiful Sel." Nick smiled sweetly. Joe rolled his eyes and glared at me. It hurt but I guess I started it, usually when he called me a freak it's first and if his friends are around the house. It was only us today since Paul Jonas was sleeping in late and Denise won't eat without him. It's really cute they love each other so much. I envied that, to have parents in love and to be in love. I couldn't imagine how that must feel. She served us pancakes with strawberries and bananas. I devoured it. We finished eating and Denise handed Joe and Nick a paper bag.

"Hold on I have to go to the bathroom." I quickly ran to the bathroom and pulled out my razor from my bag. I made a few surface cuts and patted the blood away. I came out of the bathroom a few minutes later. I needed the release before the school day.

"It's about time Demi!" Selena said not wanting to be late for school. I was surprised Joe didn't say anything but he had a weird look on his face. We made our way to Joe's car. Joe didn't like driving us but that was the rule if he wanted a car. He only drives us to we're supposed to find our own way home. We always do except for the occasional missing the bus and I'll walk home if that happens but Nick and Selena end up calling him.

I walked into school with Nick and Selena by my side. It was the end of the school year we were taking finals. A lot of boring stuff, I wasn't the best student. I didn't care except for English class. I was really into writing and film specifically TV I was raised by it growing up and It's my passion. If you could count it as one. I didn't have much time to write. It was hard doing anything but fighting to stay alive. I was ready to be a junior already it sucked being an underclassman. The lucky upperclassmen get film classes and I was so excited for that. I was sixteen as of March 23rd, Selena and Nick were still fifteen they're summer babies.

"Only a few more days we got this!" Selena said optimistically. I rolled my eyes looking down the hall seeing Joe flirting with some girl. It was annoying. That's all he ever does it seems like. I thought he had a girlfriend but I never can keep up with him. Who could? I went off to class I could barely concentrate the rest of the day. People in school picked on me a lot, it wasn't intense most of the time I was invisible but some classes I was a target. It was usually the classes I didn't have with Selena or Nick. Today was pretty easy no one said much. It's nice having easier days it makes handling the nights better.

I walked out and looked around for Selena as I saw her getting on the bus. I sighed I was hoping Selena wanted to do something after school. I should've texted her before I got outside. I wasn't ready to be home. The more time I spent there the scarier it gets. I ran into Joe. He looked at me for a second.

"Isn't that your bus?" He questioned me.

"Yeah I looked back down." I didn't want to talk to anyone.

"It just pulled away? You're not getting a ride from me." Joe stated.

"I would never get in a car with you alone." I glared at him.

"Oh really? Why you think I would try something." He laughed at that thought. I didn't think that but it hurt that he would even say that.

"No I just can't stand to be in the same room as you the only reason I go in your car ever is for Nick my best friend." I folded my arms.

"Same goes for you freak. If I wasn't being forced to spent time with you I wouldn't even give you the time of day." He was angry.

"I wouldn't ask for anything from a dick like you. Lack of any kind of human emotions. Have fun living a lonely live robot." I wanted to scream.

"Screw you loser." He walked to his car.

That hurt a lot I hopped on my bus. I didn't take the bus that goes to my house so people didn't know where I lived. It could be a bad idea if people that didn't like me knew where I lived. The only people that know are Selena's family and the Jonas' and I've made it clear to them I don't want them around my house. I took the bus to the next neighborhood over. I sat looking out of the window the whole ride. I dozed off and woke up to a hard stop, I looked around we were here. Everyone got up and exited the bus. I was grabbed by an arm.

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 **Author's Note:**

 **Let me know what you think! Reviews mean I'll continue!**


	2. Chapter 2

"Hey loser!" A breathtakingly beautiful girl pulled my arm. It was Joe's girlfriend, I wondered why she was taking the bus.

"What?" I said sighing I stepped by to get away from her. Chelsea was terrible. She's tried to make my life hard ever since she's met me.

"I don't appreciate you and your friends making Joe take you guys to school everyday. He's suppose to be picking me up." Chelsea scoffed.

"What? It's not my fault." I said trying to end the conversation. I tried to walk but she blocked me.

"Yes it is! You can stop going over there every damn morning!" She was angry.

"He would still have to take Nick you know his brother." I said sarcastically.

"I don't care about the curly haired freak. I don't want you and Slutlena in that house anymore." Chelsea glared.

"Then go talk to Selena. I don't care." I walked away angry. Who is she to tell me who I can and can not hangout with.

I walked around for awhile like I did most of the time before I got home later that night. I wasn't allowed over the Jonas' during finals week. Selena I had already been over there Monday so I had no choice but to be home. Too bad I don't have more friends or less busy friends, like that was the problem. I walked in the door and my father stood there. The fear poured into my chest. He was yelling about how stupid I was and worthless.

"Why are you even alive?" He growled. "Such a mistake."

"I-" I was too numb to even cry and I think that angered him. My dad liked to see me cry because he knew he was hurting me and that made me feel good.

"You what?" He screamed in my face and told me I was a mistake again then smacked me.

"P-please" I cried and he pushed me onto the ground.

"Bitch!" He kicked me and screamed for me to get out of his face.

I winced and stood up quickly running for the stairs before falling a couple of times. It hurt so deeply emotionally I can't ever be use to being treated the way he makes me feel. I needed a release. I ran into my room and cried on my bed before grabbing a razor and making a few fresh deep cuts on my leg. I took a breath and put pressure on my cuts. Then I wiped my tears fixed my make up and packed my things after cleaning up the mess. I couldn't be here not tonight.

I went over to the Jonas house and I snuck into the window of Kevin's room and locked the door. I cried and cried from the pain and from life. I felt save somewhat for now I always feel safe here but when I sneak in I also get worried of being caught. This was one of many times I've done this. I fell asleep even though it was 7pm and I only had breakfast today and no one ever goes into Kevin's room. I woke up at 6 am to intense hunger pains. I didn't know how I managed to sleep 11 hours while I was that hungry. I got changed and stuffed my bag of clothes underneath Kevin's bed. My secret hiding spot that no one knows about. I relaxed for a few minutes and then tended to my injuries. I had a small red mark on my face and a few bruises on my back, some were days old. I did my make up and got my book bag and chimed my way down the vines to get into the yard. I only knew about this because Kevin use to get in trouble for sneaking out. He taught me a lot of things, well actually Joe taught me these things when Kevin taught Joe. I was dreaded seeing Joe but usually when we have a fight like that we ignore each other. I sat outside of the house for a few minutes till I was sure everyone was awake and I knocked.

"Hey!" Nick smiled opening the door.

"What are you so chipper about at 6 am" I said walking in and hugging my best friend.

"Oh nothing except I got an A on all of my finals!" He said excitingly.

"What? How?" I was shocked I could never. We walked into the living room.

"Hard work." He laughed looking around the room for his phone.

"Yeah that's not what I heard last night little brother." Joe said as he walked into the living room making fun of his little brother per usual.

"What are you talking about?" Nick said not really caring about anything his brother had to say. I was confused.

"I heard you crying in your room last night. Watching too many girly shows?" Joe laughed. I frozen.

"I was downstairs all night, I fell asleep studying." Nick said rolling his eyes. I gulped, Joe has heard me crying.

"Sure." Joe said not believing his little brother. Selena walked in and I felt so relieved. I was almost caught.

"Hey Selly!" I smiled hugging my cousin. I went over to talk to her and pulled Nick into the conversation to get him away from Joe.

"Did you get enough studying done?" Nick asked us.

"Yes!" I didn't get any done. I was too busy crying but Selena nodded and they got into a conversation about Chemistry that I had no idea about.

"Breakfast!" Denise yells from the kitchen. We all sat down with Denise and Paul. It was waffle day! The best day, I had four and the guys all looked at me weirdly. Joe laughed but hid his laugh with a dirty look. I finished my food first of course, I went into the bathroom to check my cheek makeup. As I came back Joe's eyes were glued to me before turning back to his conversation. That's really strange.

"Can we have a celebration for Nick's grades?" Joe asked his parents. He just wanted a party.

"No but you can have one at the beach like planned." Denise said before grabbing her wallet. She handed the money to Nick. "Make sure he doesn't invite too many people." Every year she let them have a party somewhere that wasn't at the house. It was something the family looked forward to each year. This year Denise and Paul were going away so they wouldn't be there. They still trusted their kids.

The Jonas' were angels.

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 **Author's Note:**

 **I hope you enjoy! Reviews for more!**


	3. Chapter 3

"Give me the money." Joe said to Nick as we sat down in the car. Predictable.

"No." Nick stated and both Selena and I looked at each other knowing Nick was going to cave.

"Money or walk to school." Joe threatened.

"Fine dick." Nick handed over the money not wanting to miss the last finals or he would be toast. I felt bad but honestly Nick has never thrown a party and I'm sure he wouldn't know how to. I assumed Selena felt the same way because she didn't stick up to Joe like she often did when he picked on Nick. She was a good fighter. Joe half the time didn't fight her back, me on the other hand he never passed up the chance to get in a fight. I got out of the car as we pulled up to school with Selena and Nick right behind me.

"Nick wait!" Joe shouted.

"What?" Nick asked turning around.

"Kevin's on the phone!" They both got back into the car and giant smiles appeared on their faces. Selena and I couldn't help but smile. It was so nice, they haven't talked to Kevin in a very long time. I couldn't help but wonder if this would help Joe stop snipping at everyone. Nick was going to be ecstatic. We waited for Nick for a few minutes and he walked back over to us but Joe stayed on the line.

"How was it?!" I asked my curly haired best friend.

"Awesome, he's doing really great over there!" Nick smiled big. He was so proud of his oldest brother.

"I'm so glad!" Selena and I said at the same time.

"Wow you two are really related." Nick laughed and so did we.

We went to school and as soon as I walked over my locker there she was. Tall, blonde, evil and perfect. Chelsea and Joe they've been on and off again for long time. It hurt when he started dating her since she always picked on me growing up. Chelsea doesn't like how much time I spend with the Jonas' she knows that Joe would never go for me, but she thinks I spend too much time around the whole family. That it makes her unlikable by his family. It's not my fault his whole family can see the kind of bitch she really is. Once in middle school she told the whole grade that I had an eating disorder. I didn't I was just not being fed at home and I got really skinny. People actually made fun of me for two years over it. I still get people questioning me all of the time. She's also turned Joe against me. We use to be friends, I was always close to Nick but he use to be a good friend. Till we grew up and it really hurt.

"What?" I said to the spawn of all evil.

"I saw you sneaking over to the Jonas' house last night very late." She accused. I felt sick and didn't know how to explain it.

"I-" "Since when has little miss innocent Lovato hooking up with the baby Jonas?" She smirked. It took me a second but I understood that she was insinuating that I was seeing Nick.

"It's not what you think." I said.

"So what you just went over there at midnight? I'm not stupid I know what that means" She eyed me down with her death stare. I couldn't think of any other reason and I don't want her thinking I was with Joe or anything. She probably wouldn't let me survive that.

"Yeah okay you're right Chelsea." I breathed deeply.

"I knew it! So how long has this been going on?" She asked as if we were friends.

"Not long. He rejected me." I lied. It was the only conclusion I could think of that made sense and didn't make me look like a liar or make Nick uncomfortable.

"Oh wow." She was in shock. Chelsea swore Nick was into me but little did she know it was Selena he was into. I left her standing there I think I may have saw humanity in her face for once. I really hope this doesn't get back to Selena or Nick. I think I'm safe.

I went to lunch a few hours later and sat outside alone. Selena had an appointment and Nick had extra credit to make up to keep on the honor roll. I couldn't stand being alone at school but there wasn't much I could do about it. I started wolfing down my food. I was starving. Another reason my eating disorder rumors were everywhere because I would eat so fast than go to the bathroom. I was self harming but I would much rather people believe that then the truth.

"Hungry much Demi?" I looked up and saw Joe laughing. He sat down I was confused this wasn't normal for him to sit with me especially if Nick wasn't here.

"Where's all of your friends?" I asked Joe.

"They went out for lunch and I can't afford to do that again or I won't pass." He said.

"Oh." I said about to stand up.

"Wait, sit with me? I don't want to be alone." Joe asked looking lonely so I sat back down. This was weird. I wondered he started believing those old rumors again. Trying to stop me from going to throw up. It's kind I guess or maybe he just didn't want to be a loser who eats alone like me.

"Why?" I asked him.

"I just thought it'd be nice." He smiled it was a smile directed at me. I haven't seen that in a long time.

"Okay." I held back a smile as I watched him eat.

"So how have you been?" Joe asked.

"Good, I guess." I lied and I started playing with my hands.

"I guess? Shouldn't you know?" Joe took the last few bites of his sandwich.

"I suppose but I don't know." I didn't know how to talk to him. "Demi this is the most time we've spent together without anyone since before high school." Joe stated.

"Yeah I know." I looked at him

"I want to know how things are with you." He looked into my last conversation I had with Joe alone was when he found out that I could possibly have an eating disorder. Joe was mad and I tried to tell him I didn't have one but he didn't believe me so we just didn't talk. He told Selena to watch my every move but she knew I didn't have one.

"I'm fine Joe." I lied once again. "

You don't look fine. You look sick again." He said still looking into my eyes. I knew he was just worried but it doesn't make this whole thing easier for me.

"Thanks just what a girl wants to hear." I was angry.

"I know you have food issues but you can't keep doing this anymore. I see how skinny you're getting." Joe said worried. I stood up.

"You know nothing! I love to eat! I don't have an eating disorder Joe! Every single day I pray I can find something to eat! I don't like school but it's a way to eat something that's why I'm here every fucking day!" Joe's faced looked shocked. I couldn't stop myself from screaming.I know I shouldn't have said anything but I had to get him off of my back. He looked confused I'm sure he didn't know what I meant by any of this. I walked out of the lunchroom leaving Joe alone. I walked to class and finished out the day.

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 **Author's Note:**

 **I would love some opinions on what you would like to see happen! Review for a new chapter!**


	4. Chapter 4

Demi's POV

I felt weird about the way things were with Joe. I was so mad about the way he was accusing me and not believing me. I told him a few things I regretted. I shook it off hoping he would forget it by tomorrow. I went home hoping things were better. I wasn't planning on it being. I knew what my life was like. My dad was passed out on probably heroin. He was dipping into that slowly lately. It's bad but I really couldn't care less. If he treated me great or even good I would sympathize with him because I know drug addiction isn't a choice. He was a bad person before he got addicted to drugs so I don't care at all. I'm tired of all the beatings and being so poor so he can score drugs. It's too hard living like this. I went straight to my room and sat on my bed. Staring that the scars on my body. I didn't know what to do for the beach party tomorrow. My body was bruised and broken. I couldn't fake sick it was the last day of school. I would have to swim in long shorts and something to cover my back. I had time to think about it. I closed my eyes and tried to rest but I was too hungry. About an hour later I sneak down to try and find something to eat. I was shocked to see my dad still up.

"What the fuck do you want?" My dad asked as he took a sip of his drink. He had a look on his face. It scared me.

"Just a drink of water." I gulped I was so scared. He looked extremely high.

"Want some?" He pointed to his needle with a smirk on his face.

"Of course not." I scoffed. I was offended and spoke before I thought.

"What did you just say you bitch?" I ignored his insults.

"Please I-" He slammed my stomach into the counter.

"You need to shut up!" My dad yelled in my face.

"O-o-okay" My entire body shook. Pain filled me and I tried to move but he got close to me.

"Go upstairs before I stick you so you can pull that stick out of your ass." My dad said before shooting up heroin into his arm.

It was the first time I saw him do it. I thought I was use to everything he was doing but that fucked with my head. I didn't know if he was serious about drugging me or if he wanted to scare me.I went upstairs I was so frustrated and scared and in pain. My stomach was already bruising. I was use to the pain but lately it was getting to be too much. What I would do if I could to get out of here. I grabbed my stuff again and left. There was no way I was risking him hurting me anymore today. I ran to Selena's house and knocked knowing I wasn't supposed to be over again this week she opened the door.

"Demi? What are you doing here?" She asked me as I gulped.

"Can I stay here tonight? My stepmother was is a mood." I smiled. It was a fake smile. I'm good at them.

"Of course you can." I was relieved. "I got you." Selena nodded her head and we went to her room.

Selena didn't know too much about my situation but she knew things weren't good. I made her think it was more my stepmother and that my dad just made her in charge. The whole family thinks he's a workaholic but it's more like alcoholic. I don't know why I didn't admit the truth it was too scary. I know Mandy wouldn't want Selena to know. She tries to hide Selena from all the bad and I envy that. I have it so hard I want someone to care about me like that. Mandy cares about me and so does her husband but Selena comes first and I know that. I know Selena could handle it but she shouldn't have to. I would never tell anyone about my life I didn't want to get called a liar or be out on the streets with nowhere to live. I don't want sympathy and I don't want people to see me as a weak little damaged girl. The kids at school would make fun of me and I could go into the foster system and I didn't want to leave Selena.

"So what's going on with your the evil stepmother?" Selena asked looking at me.

"Just being a bitch. The usual stuff." I faked a smile once again and put on a movie.

"Maybe one day he'll leave her." Selena tried to cheer me up.

"Yeah maybe." I knew that would never happen. They used each other and they liked it that way.

"Let's watch a movie." She hugged me and put on a mine. It was nice watching a movie and relaxing. We talked for while and before falling asleep.

The next morning I woke up looking at my cousin sleeping sweetly. I smiled she looked really cared for. That's something I'm happy about. She has a really good life and she deserves it. The last thing I would ever do is let her worry about me it's selfish. The one thing I never want to be in this life is selfish. That's my parents not me. I walked into the bathroom and took a long shower. I felt so dirty it was nice and hot I'm not use to that at home or using expensive hair products. I loved being here. I finally feel so clean and nice, it was refreshing. I stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my body. I took a deep breath and looked into the medicine cabinet looking for cream. I saw a bottle sitting there and I picked it up. It was a bottle of Xanax pills.

"Mandy Teefy". I know it's suppose to reduce anxiety. I needed it more than ever, I looked around the bathroom. I was so anxious about the party and my life and all of the time. It's not fair and I don't know what to do. I took one and put the bottle into my bag. My aunt had postpartum after she had my younger cousin but she never took her pills. She won't miss them.

* * *

 **Author's Note:**

 **Xanax is an anti anxiety medication but I want to be clear. Yes it can be addicting, if you take too much and use it to get high. It also can improve your life if you take it as prescribed! So I'm not blaming anyone. I, myself take medication for my anxiety. I don't take Xanax but something in that family!**


	5. Chapter 5

I got dressed quickly and left the bathroom. I ran into Selena who was in her robe about to get in the shower. I was hoping she didn't know the pills were in the cabinet. I didn't think she would. I gave her a hug.

"Good morning!" I said with a fake smile plastered on my face.

She smiled. "Morning." I was about to leave when she turned around. "Hey Demi, Nick and Joe are going to pick us up here." Selena said explaining that we were going to be late.

"Okay." I said. She quickly jumped into the shower and I went downstairs, luckily my aunt works in the morning.

I didn't really want to see Joe. I knew he would be different because of our conversation. Good thing I took that Xanax. It won't be that difficult now. This was the first time I ever took something like that. I've never even had a drink of alcohol before. I didn't really care about anything anymore there's really no point in my life. I know that I'll never be happy or good. Selena finished her shower and came down to eat we had eggs for breakfast and then the Jonas boys knocked.

Selena opened the door. "Come in!" Joe and Nick walked in.

"Hey guys!" Nick said heading to grab a muffin. "Yum." He said before shoving the whole thing in his mouth. We all laughed.

"Muffin?" I handed Joe. He looked at me and smiled I was shocked.

"Thank you." Joe said I kept the shocked look on my face. He actually addressed me without an insult.

"We should be going or we'll be late." Selena and I picked up our stuff and we took off. The whole ride I didn't talk it was mostly Joe and Selena talking about music. The Xanax started kicking in and I actually felt normal. That was a nice change. I started talking to Nick about random stuff. It felt so good not to feel constant anxiety.

It was second period when I walked by the lunchroom and a hand pulled me in. I was spooked.

"What?" I asked Joe. He was acting so weird today I wasn't use to it. I wondered if it was in my head but then I remembered this pill wasn't a miracle it wasn't going to give me false memories.

"I'm sorry Demi." He said softly.

"Wh-"

Joe interrupted. "Please just let me talk?" He asked.

"Okay." I looked at him confused. What did he want to talk about so badly. Why was he being so nice? Questioned flooded my relaxed mind.

"I didn't mean to make you feel bad. I really thought I was trying to help." He paused. "It's a horrible thing an eating disorder and if you were going through such body issues I wanted to be there to tell you how beautiful you were and that you didn't need to do that." Joe rubbed my hand.

I was so honored with the words he just said. Beautiful, no one has ever called me that before. "Thank you, it means a lot." I felt bad because I did have body issues it just wasn't about food.

"As long as you know how amazing you are." He smiled. This was out of the ordinary.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" I asked confused. I liked it but it was so different. This was the Joe I knew a long time ago.

"I talked to Kevin and he informed me about how much of a jerk I've been since dating Chelsea. I feel really bad especially after hearing the way she talked about you." Joe said truthfully.

I smiled. "Wow, thank you for believing me over her." Chelsea had something coming to her.

"She's never been someone I trusted." Joe mentioned. That was good to know.

"I see why." I thought about all the ways she's made me feel like a loser. She's terrible.

"Chelsea told me that you were dating Nick to get to me." We laughed.

"Wow Chelsea is such a bitch" I said shocked at we were even having this conversation.

"Yeah I'm glad I'm away from that girl." Joe said smiling at me.

"Yeah me too. She drove our friendship apart is it really sucks." I opened up not worrying about a possible rejection.

Joe's face softened. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have let it happen. Kevin talked sense into me and I won't act like that jerk I was again." Joe was feeling sad.

"It's fine I understand how it must have been for you." I looked at him.

"It's not fine and I will make it up to you, Selena and Nick." He hugged me. We haven't hugged in years I missed this and I missed Joe I'm so happy  
The Xanax allowed me to have a normal conversation. Wow I love this pill.

The last bell rang and everyone ran outside. I had taken a half of another Xanax after my conversation with Joe so I felt good still. I met him by his car.

"Hey stranger want a ride?" Joe smiled.

"Wow you really were serious about changing." I got in his car.

Joe laughs. "Yeah I am." We drove to his house.

I was still nervous about being at the beach but I decided to just say I didn't have my bathing suit. That way if we did swim I could just go in my clothes. I had on leggings and a blue shirt on so it wasn't something I couldn't get wet. We got to the Jonas house and I went inside with Joe behind me.

I sat on the couch next to Joe waiting for Nick to be ready for the party. It was two hours later. Selena was upstairs with Nick. I tried to let them be alone as much as I can because I know they both like each other. Joe knew too so he stayed away with me. We were watching TV and talking about Kevin and school.

"I miss him a lot." Joe admitted his feelings to me.

I didn't expect this sudden change. "You'll see him again real soon." I smiled giving him the hope he needed.

"Thanks." Joe smiled. "You're great." I blushed.

Joe really misses his brother. I felt bad that he isn't around, Kevin is a good influence on Joe. Every time Joe tried to dig around my personal life I changed the subject. I know he wants to know the truth behind the fight in the cafeteria. I don't want to have to lie to him I would rather avoid questions. I did a good job because he didn't bring it up. We started talking about the beach party.

"Are you excited?" Joe asked me.

"No I'm nervous." I knew I was nervous but I just felt numb and bubbly.

"It'll be fun I'll hang out with you." He mentioned. Joe wanted to hang out with me?

"Why not with your friends?" I asked him.

"They're all going to be with Chelsea and that's the last person I want to see today." He laughed.

"Okay I'll distract you." We both laughed.

"So what do you want to be when you grow up?" Joe asked me.

"What?" I laughed at how random it was.

"Everyone is always asking me what I want to do. The truth is I don't really know but I hope it's something I like." Joe looks at me. "What about you? What are your dreams?

I thought about it. "No one's ever asked me that." I admitted.

"What really?" Joe was surprised. "Well I'm asking you now."

"I've always been interested in writing." I said noticing the look on Joe's face.

"That's really cool. Do you write? I'd love to read it sometime." He offered.

"It's not that kind of writing. It's screenwriting." I thought about the projects I've started but never get to finish before my dad gets into my room.

"Why screenwriting?" Joe asked curiously.

"I grew up watching a lot of TV and I fell in love with the way some characters are written and the storytelling. It's something I really love." I smiled at the thought of living that future.

Joe smiled. "That sounds amazing." He was impressed.

"What about you?" I asked him.

''I've never really told anyone this but I've kinda always been interested in the job behind the camera. When I was a kid I saw a documentary on a big time director and I've always thought that would be such an honor to have that job." Joe looked at me.

"Sounds like you have a perfectly attainable dream." I said softly.

"Maybe you'll write the scripts and I'll direct him." We smiled at each other.

We talked for awhile about friends and pop and I bonded over the love of TV It was nice getting to talk to him again. It had be so long and back when we use to be friends we were too young to have such big dreams. It's good to know he's an actual person and not some egotistical asshole like I thought he turned into.

* * *

 **Author's Note:**

 **Next chapter is the beach party! Review please! I don't post unless I notice people are reading.**


	6. Chapter 6

We all got to the beach party and Nick dashed for the water almost immediately. Nick was like a little kid when it came to the beach. I always wanted to be so happy that something good could make me act like a kid again but I never was a kid. The only time I've ever been to the beach was with my cousin. Selena stood next to Joe and I and stared at Nick who was already in the water. I knew she wanted to be with him. She's liked him for years but she will never say it out loud.

"Go for it Selly!" I smiled at her.

"Are you sure?" Selena asked looking at me not wanting to leave me alone.

I nodded. "I'll find something to do I'll be okay don't worry have fun!" Selena hugged me and went over to Nick. I admired what they had with each other. This beautiful friendship and a blossoming into a love for each other, the best part is they respect each other as people. The greatest two people I know.

"They are something else." Joe and I laughed at Nick and Selena.

"At this rate we're going to have to lock them in a room and force them to talk about their feelings." I said staring at them before glancing over at Joe.

"Sounds like a plan." He said as we turned around. "Do you want something to eat?"

"Yeah that'd be great." We went to get some food. We grabbed hot dogs. I think he wanted to feed me. It made me feel bad that he probably still thinks I have an eating disorder. I guess I could prove that I didn't by eating the hot dog.

"Here you go." Joe said passing me the mustard.

I loaded my hot dog with mustard and ketchup. "What?" I asked noticing Joe was making a weird face.

"Mustard and ketchup together." Joe was grossed out at the combination. He had just mustard.

I laughed. "It's normal."

"Nothing is normal about it." Joe said as he bit into his hot dog.

"It's very normal." I shook my head and ate my food.

The xanax wore off I was so scared of something bad happening. The anxiety was too much. I wanted to cut but I knew I couldn't. We finished eating and went back near where we left Selena and Nick. They were still near the water. Nick was in the water and Selena was laying on the sand taking a break but watching him. They didn't notice us.

"Want a drink?" Joe asked me looking at the collection of alcohol.

"Yes please." I needed something to numb my pain so I took it. I've never drank before but I'm not sure he knows that. He's drank with Nick a few times so I think he assumes we all drink at parties. I don't go to parties so I don't drink. I've seen many people drink to forget all the time. There's no reason why I shouldn't do the same thing I'm tired of being the good girl. I'm afraid of my dad or stepmother finding out I was here, I was scared Chelsea would make a scene if she saw me with Joe and if anyone sees my body. I needed to be drunk.

"Hey, I'll be right back I have to use the bathroom." Joe handed me his drink and left. I downed my drink before grabbing another one. I didn't want him to catch on that I wanted to be plastered to forget this painful life. At least for one night.

Joe walked back and I handed him his drink. "Thanks." He said.

"So what now?" I asked him.

"Do you wanna dance?" I was surprised as he asked me to dance.

"Isn't that a thing couples do?" I asked Joe raising my eyebrow.

"Maybe it is, so what?" Joe winked and took my hand as we started dancing. He held me in his arms while we swayed. I thought I was dreaming or drunk this wasn't what I expected tonight to be at all. This felt like a date. I've never been on a date but this is what I picture one to be. Joe wasn't treating me like the way a friend does. It felt like we were dating.

We danced for a couple songs with a few drink breaks.

"You look so good tonight." Joe smiled at me. "So pretty like always." He added rubbing my arm gently.

I blushed. "Thank you." I was wondering what had gotten into him. Joe has been treating me so good and there's no way Kevin influenced all of this. I wanted to know what was going on in that head of his. I was beginning to get sloppy the alcohol was hitting me hard. Joe was maybe buzzed but I was full on drunk. We kept dancing and having fun. I noticed Selena burning her eyes into the bed of my head. She was so confused that made two of us. I wanted to get out of here the last thing I needed was Selena questioning me. "Let's go for a walk." I knew if we stayed in this spot any longer she would be right here.

Joe and I went off into a quiet area and talked, laughed, drank. I felt so close to him. I felt so safe. What did this mean? I wasn't really sure what it meant, maybe I was too drunk to know. It was all very new to me. I was so nervous and scared of my feelings and what he's thinking.

He appear like a dream to me.

"Tonight was great." He said taking a sip of his beer.

"Yeah it was. I really needed it." I said looking down remembering reality.

"Is everything okay?" Joe asked worried we both knew I was going through stuff from that outburst in the cafeteria yesterday.

"Yes I just want to go swimming." Wow I was really drunk.

"Okay let's go dork." He laughed and took his shirt off.

I was fidgeting he looked so good. I downed my drink and ran into the ocean. It probably wasn't the best idea but it sounded fun, I'm a different person when I drink clearly. I feel good for once and I wanted to go with the flow tonight maybe it was exactly what I needed.

"I've never done anything like this in my life!" I yelled over the waves.

"Me either." Joe smiled at me pulling me close to him.

"I'm not so sure of that." I mentioned. I figured Joe was a regular beach goer especially with his dates.

He laughed. "I think you'd be surprised at how awful my dates usually go." There it was the word date.

We swam I almost drowned once he kept me afloat. "Thank you for keeping me from drowning." I laughed.

"Miss Lovato I had no idea you could have this much fun." He smirked and it turned into a laugh.

I smiled. "Me either." I almost slip half my head going under water.

Joe pulled me up "Whoa there you're okay." He held me closely so I wouldn't go underwater. I looked into his brown eyes.

"This has been so nice." I smiled and he stared at my lips before placing his on me. I kissed him back and he pulled me closer. I wrapped my legs around him and grabbed his neck. Joe kissed my neck and I giggled. He kissed my lips again and deepened it. We were full on making out in the ocean. I was so drunk that I barely even knew what I was doing and I didn't this was my first time doing this. We pulled away before this got too heavy. "Wow."

"You want to get out of the ocean?" Joe laughed.

"Yes." I smiled. We got out he helped me because I was way too drunk to swim We got out of the water and Joe went to hold my hand.

"Let's go back to my house to dry up." He suggested.

"Yeah good idea." We walked to his house.

* * *

 **Author's Note:**

 **Next one get's interesting hahaha! Thoughts?**


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